The Gift Wrap of Christmas

My family enjoys a gift exchange at Christmas time. Presents are carefully chosen and wrapped in beautiful paper. At the appointed time, all the gifts are placed on the floor in the middle of the living room, as everyone gathers around. There are no gift tags attached to the gifts however. Instead, we each draw a number from a basket. Beginning with the person who drew the lowest number, we choose a gift from the pile to unwrap. Those with higher numbers can choose to “steal” someone else’s already opened present, if they wish. It’s great fun because the gifts are often surprising, occasionally creative, and always inexpensive. In fact, they usually consist of things stuffed away in a basement cupboard that the owner no longer wants. A common term to describe this type of gift exchange is called a White Elephant Gift Exchange. This year’s gifts included a smiley face coffee mug, a puzzle, a mini crock pot, a gaudy Christmas village building, and – the most creative – an emergency candy bar.   

What intrigues me most about our gift exchange is the giftwrap. The way the gift is wrapped sometimes provides a clue as to what the gift is (coffee mug), but often a gift is placed in a larger box or a beautiful bag and there is no way to determine what the gift might be by looking at the way it is wrapped. In fact, the recipient is usually quite surprised (and not so happy!) when they open a gift that has been beautifully wrapped. Just as you can’t judge a book by it’s cover, you can’t always judge the value of a gift by it’s packaging.

Thinking about the way we wrap presents for people reminds me of the ways the Christmas message is sometimes packaged. The difference is that, although the packaging may differ, the message of Christmas is invaluable. I attended two different Christmas Eve church services this year. Both consisted of music, candles, scripture reading, and a Christmas message. But they were packaged quite differently.

The first service was quite casual. It began with the praise team’s presentation of Christmas music, along with coordinated spotlights, providing a contemporary concert-type atmosphere. A short movie showed the Christmas story read by two young children (with precious voice expression), and the four-part message was centered around the Advent candles. At the end of the service the Christ candle was lit, and then we all took turns lighting our own candles from the Christ candle. It was a beautiful image – the Christ candle (Jesus is the light of the world) and an auditorium filled with glittering candles, showing our prayer to be light to our world.

The second service I attended was more formal and liturgical. It was organized in five sections, each based on a song (canticle) from scripture. The service began with music by organ, handbells, flute, cello, French horn, and oboe, which set the mood for the sevice. Choir anthems and congregational singing were a part of each section, along with scripture read by congregation members. The Christ candle was also lit at the end of the service. What stirred me most at this service was the music – the resplendent organ and the joyful singing, reminding us of the joy of Christmas.

There are many ways a church (or other group) will decide to “package” the Christmas story. Whether casual or elegant, using old hymns or contemporary songs, displaying candles or pageantry – these are all just wrapping paper. The actual gift is the same, and it’s a gift from God. The good news, and the gift, is that:

“…a Savior has been born to you, he is Christ the Lord.” 

(Luke 2:11)

No matter how we choose to wrap it, this is the true gift of Christmas. And, like the gifts my family opened, it is surprising. Surprising that God would leave heaven and come to Earth. It is also creative - who could ever have predicted the amazing way God chose to bring about His plan for our salvation. But it is certainly not inexpensive. This gift cost Jesus his life; it is the most expensive gift ever given. It is no "white elephant" gift. God knew the exactly what we needed; this gift is perfectly designed for everyone who receives it. It is the absolutely best gift.

Thank you Jesus.

Merry Christmas!

Six Months with Toby

Toby and I met exactly six months ago, on June 12. I still remember his brown eyes pleading for me to take him home, gently placing his paw on my arm as we sat together on the grass outside the animal shelter. I knew that this was the dog God had chosen for me, and six months later, I’m so thankful for him.

He’s come a long way. I was so worried the first three weeks when he was so sick. Now he’s full of energy and loves to run and play; he’s perfectly healthy. He loves to race down the hall to catch the tennis ball or his rope; it’s really funny to watch him try to bring both back at once – the rope in his mouth while he bats the tennis ball around like a hockey puck. Interestingly, he will only chase the ball inside; I can’t get him to do it when we’re outside.

Toby loves the dog park; he’s so excited that he starts whining from the back seat even before we pull into the dog park driveway. He enjoys running with the other dogs and just sniffing around off-leash. He also loves going for walks as well as just sitting on “his” couch and looking outside.

He does well when I’m gone now that we have a pet gate for his room. He goes right to his room and sits on his chair when it’s time for me to leave each morning. I give him a milkbone treat when I leave, but he never eats it until I get home. He’s even learned to go in his crate when we’re at Grandma’s house. (That took quite a while as he was terrified of it at first.)

We’ve been spending the weekends at my parents’ since October to help care for my dad, and Toby has done very well with these transitions every week. He loves Grandpa and Grandma and has appropriated one of their couches as “his” spot. He also knows who will give him treats and the best place to sit at mealtimes.

When I think back to the beginning of the summer – how much I missed Tosca and wondering if I could even “do” another dog – I’m amazed at how this dog has captured my heart. I still miss Tosca, but I don’t miss her in the same way that I did all through last year. When I think of my dog, now the first thought is of Toby. And I hardly ever call him Tosca (or “her”) anymore. I love playing with him and watching him run and play. Although we still have things to work on (jumping, chewing, etc.), he’s making good progress. Hopefully we’ll get to some kind of obedience training this spring. And it's incredibly difficult to get a good photo of him. Although he's a beautiful dog, he hates having his picture taken and I can never get him to sit (or stand) still and look at the camera. In fact, I tried for quite a while to get a good photo of the two of us this morning, but all he wanted to do was play...just a little frustrating!!

I’m so thankful that God led me to Toby – he is the perfect dog for me.

Happy Six Month Anniversary!

You'd never know it from this photo, but Toby wanted nothing to do with Santa. He wouldn't stay by him at all until I came up and the photographer happened to catch the split second he turned around instead of looking at me. Every dog needs to visit Santa at least once!

Community

I think this has been the longest stretch between blog posts, but life has been just a bit hectic around here during the past three months. Dealing with my dad’s heart surgery and recovery, LVAD education classes, writing CarePage updates, and starting a new school year has left no time for writing blog posts.

As the Thanksgiving holiday approaches, there are many things I’m thankful for. A wonderful job, my new dog – Toby, the gift of salvation, and my loving family are some things that come to mind. This year I’m certainly thankful for medical technology and the staff at the Meijer Heart Center. I’m also very thankful my dad is here to celebrate this holiday and is gaining strength each day. But there’s something else that I’m especially thankful for this November – the gift of community.

Throughout the last two months, my parents and I have been enveloped in love and care by friends, colleagues, and relatives - the Community of Christ. I have always felt part of a community, but I now have a much stronger sense of what Christian community truly means. So many people have been the hands and feet of Jesus to us.

The friend who provided a hot meal, cooking in the crockpot and ready to eat, when we arrived home after a long day at the hospital on the day my dad was discharged.

My fellow staff members, who brought me and my parents numerous home-cooked meals, frozen and ready to microwave, during the busy weeks of preparing for school conferences and driving to Grand Rapids to visit my dad in the hospital.

The friend who took care of my dog for several days surrounding my dad’s surgery, so I could stay in Grand Rapids with my mom. This same friend also stopped by my house several different days to let Toby out after work when I needed to go right to the hospital after school.

The lady who came and spent a morning helping my mom and sister clean the house after the flooring was installed, so it would be ready for my dad.

The many people who have written messages on the CarePage updates and sent cards, letting us know they have been praying for us.

The parents of my second graders, who just last week filled my freezer with meals, so I don’t have to worry about cooking as I try to balance helping my parents with preparing for school.

Friends who have continued to inquire how my dad, my mom, and I am doing.

I have been moved to tears by these thoughtful acts of kindness from people who have reminded me in tangible ways what it truly means to Love one another and to live in Christian community.

Thank-you, Lord, for this wonderful gift.

The Heart Of It

A week ago I knew very little about picc lines, infusions, various kinds of catheters, or “hospital time.” I had never heard of Milrinone or an LVAD. It’s amazing how much one week can change your life. I’ve spent at least part of (almost) every day this week at the Meijer Heart Center in Grand Rapids, MI, where my father was admitted after a heart catheterization on Monday showed his heart has severely weakened. I’ve spent every spare minute researching the LVAD after the team of heart doctors mentioned this as a possible treatment, while my dad underwent a multitude of tests to see if he qualified for this procedure. What I learned amazed me on an analytical or theoretical level – technology can do amazing things! It also overwhelmed me and my parents on a practical level – living with this device requires a tremendous amount of care and lifestyle change; could my dad and our family really do this?

An LVAD (Left Ventricular Assist Device) is a mechanical pump that is implanted just below the diaphragm during open-heart surgery. One end is attached to the heart’s left ventrical. It continuously pumps blood out of the heart, through the titanium pump, to the other end (connected to the aorta), where it carries the oxygen-rich blood to the rest of the body. A driveline (tube going through the skin) connects the pump to a system controller, a small computer worn outside the body. The controller is the “brain” of the LVAD as it displays messages and warnings if there are any problems. The LVAD is powered by two batteries during the day and a wall unit at night. The batteries last around 10-12 hours, so you always need to be charging extra sets of batteries. Electricity is vital for the LVAD to work! The LVAD has primarily been used on patients waiting for a heart transplant, but during the last several years it has started to also be used as a “Destination Therapy” (which would be the case for my father, as he didn’t qualify for a heart transplant).

photo from Thoratec, HeartMate ll

this is the model they showed us in the hospital,

this type of pump would be implanted

After the surgery, the patient recovers in the hospital for 2-4 weeks. Once they return home, someone needs to be with them at all times for at least 90 days, in order to change the dressing and in case there are any problems with the device. There are also weekly (later monthly) visits to the LVAD clinic to make sure the device is working. The family and caregivers are also trained to know how to live with it and troubleshoot any possible difficulties. When leaving the house, a bag carrying extra batteries and other supplies must always be brought along.

My research showed many good results – most people have a much better quality of life and heartily recommend it. Complications can occur, however, due to infection or blood clots or issues with the device not working properly. The mechanical heart pump can extend someone’s life for 3-7 years.

We had lots of questions for the doctors; they were very helpful and patient as we struggled to decide whether this would be beneficial for my dad and our family. It is a huge step as life would change drastically. But we realized that life would change even if he didn’t have this procedure, as he would just continue getting weaker for the next 6-16 months.

After a lot of discussion, thinking, and prayer, we decided to proceed with the LVAD. My dad was released from the hospital today and has a small portable pump, which continuously infuses Milrinone, a heart medication, into his heart to strengthen it. He’ll remain on this for the next 2-3 weeks as we make preparations for the surgery, build a care support team (if anyone in the Grand Rapids area is willing to stay/visit with him for 1-3 hours per week from Oct-Dec, please let me know), and become more educated on life with the LVAD.

This week has been a whirlwind with lots to process. I feel like our lives are on hold. And yet, we’ve prayed for God’s clear direction and wisdom in our decision-making, and we feel God’s presence. We are so thankful for our Christian community – in Michigan and beyond – which has been upholding us in prayer. As I’ve listened to the radio on my drives to and from Grand Rapids this week, I was struck by how many Christian contemporary songs have the word heart in them. And how the heart of God is filled with love for us. In some ways, we are apprehensive about this impending surgery and life change. But we also know that God is with us and will continue to give us what we need each step along the way. And that is really the heart of it.

Cousins

Question: Can two dogs – large and small, male and female, adult and puppy-ish, get along?

Answer: Yes - with patience, watchfulness, and separate rooms.

Toby met his “cousin,” Daisy, as she spent the past week with us. Daisy is a three-year-old “shichon” (shih tzu & bichon cross) and is much smaller than Toby. She’s used to her family (my sister and brother-in-law and their kids) and loves people. Other dogs – not so much. Of course it didn’t help that I had her in a travel crate during the car ride to my house when she’s used to being free in the car. Toby was excited to meet her: tail wagging, barking, sniffing, and jumping all around. Daisy, however, was not impressed and wanted nothing to do with him. For the first couple of days she stuck pretty close to me and avoided Toby completely. I guess when you’re a little 10 pound dog Toby seems like a giant.

Gradually the two dogs got used to each other and Daisy tolerated Toby’s sniffs (eventually sniffing back). Daisy had her room with her crate and food and Toby had his room, so they each had their private space (although Toby kept trying to get in Daisy’s room to get her food). When I was home, Daisy’s spot was on top of the couch right behind me. Toby was either on the floor, next to me on the couch, or at his favorite lookout spot.

By the end of the week they had learned to get along and share each other’s water bowls. We even managed a walk outside all together! They each had their hyper times (never at the same time, thankfully), so we got plenty of playtime in. Daisy loves pulling things out of the trashcan and Toby still enjoys shredding things (his nice patriotic bandana is gone), so I kept doors closed and things up high. It’s like having toddlers around! 

Overall it was a fun week. I loved having a little dog who likes to cuddle and sleep by me (take note Toby!!). It was also good for both dogs to learn how to deal with each other. We’ll see if they remember each other at Christmas time.

Hopefully Daisy is showing Toby how to go in his crate as Toby is still afraid of it.

Yes, they are both on the bed at the same time! (Toby didn't stay for long, though.)

Love this picture of them both keeping a lookout.

I never could have gotten them this close to each other at the beginning of the week.